Family First

There is a popular saying we use in my wife's family. It is "Family First." While it may sound cliche', it's what we usually say in order to rationalize missing church cause family is in town, or missing a meeting to be with family, or forgoing some other responsibility in order to be with the family. The truth is, "Family First" is a pretty good principle for individuals and family's to live by, even if you do occasionally forgo what ever might be the more "responsible" use of your time. This past year, and especially the past couple of weeks, the importance of the family has been on my mind a lot. I have come to understand the importance of familial relationships in ways that I had not understood them before. I have come to appreciate more the roles that each individual plays in a family, in supporting each other through the most difficult trials, and in enjoying each other no matter what is going on. As our family has dealt with our mother's battle with cancer and her passing, the time we have spent together in mourning, reflecting, and celebrating have strengthened bonds that are eternal. We have stayed up late laughing, playing Wii, having trivial pursuit competitions, watching the World Series and Project Runway and Survivor, debating Prop 8, and eating a lot of food. We've woken up early to hike together, golf together, and go to church together. All of these seemingly menial activities have been the ingredients that have made up the spiritual and emotional support each individual needs during this most difficult time.

Anyone in attendance at Sharon's funeral service could not leave that service without a strong conversion to the importance of family. That service put life into proper perspective and allowed each in attendance to reflect on what is most important. A person's funeral service is probably a pretty good representation of the kind of life a person led. It was obvious from that service that "Family First" was a doctrine that Sharon lived her life by. A few days after the service, I talked to a non-member of the church that was in attendance. She is going through marital problems after having been married for 26 years. With tears in her eyes, she told me how much she wished her husband was in attendance with her to help remind him of how important their family unit is in the grand scheme of things. She said the service was such a powerful reminder of what really matters in life; that your relationships with your family is what brings true joy. After the service my parents remained in their seats for a good 15 minutes. I went and asked them what they were doing. My dad said they were recovering from the powerful spirit they felt there, and how grateful they are that I am part of this great family. (I think they were recovering from trying to corral my son Axel for an hour.)

This brings me to Prop 8. I know - we're all sick of Prop 8 and can't wait till we don't have to talk about it anymore. But Elder Ballard actually asked us to blog about it, so here I go. I'm just following the prophet.

All of this is under attack. Satan knows that it is the support system of the family that encourages individuals to live righteously, that uplifts individuals in times of trials, and that directly affects the success or failure of a society. It has never been more obvious to me, but it is not obvious to many. The fight for the legalization of gay marriage has never been more heated and more polarizing than it is today. It is because those of us who understand the importance of traditional family roles see it slipping away. We understand that future generations are at risk of not having the support system available to them that I have been so grateful for in recent weeks and months. We understand that without this support system, individuals function as individuals, more selfish, more confused, lonely, and lost as they struggle to understand where true joy can be found. The proponents of gay marriage have put forth convincing arguments. You don't think I'd like to have a man around the house to fix things? To put up shelves? To run our speakers through the ceiling? To fix my bedside light? Maybe to watch sports with? I would, okay. I get that. But that doesn't require the law to change the definition of marriage, and to corrupt the most sacred institution in our society. The marriage institution has already been beaten down and degraded through divorce and infidelity. To introduce homosexuality into marriage will virtually dispose of the institution central to the perpetuation, replenishment, and development of our society. (2 Steves cannot a baby make.) Actually, in order for a gay couple to have children, their only option is to rely on unnatural methods of attaining children. Perhaps that is an indication that such a marriage is not natural.

While I was out picketing for Prop 8 this last weekend, I was encouraged by the number of thumbs up and honks of support we got from passer-bys. It seems the majority of society still understands the sacredness of the family institution, and the value it is to individuals and to society as a whole. Aside from a few "F" you's and birds flying out of Suburu Outbacks (lezbos) and Mazda Miatas (gay boys) the support was overwhelmingly positive.

I apologize for the long and serious posting, and for the month long gap between this post and the last post about farting.