"Man Charged With Battery for Farting on Cop"
Jose Cruz had been arrested for drunk driving and was sitting in the police station awaiting a sobriety test. As the patrolman was preparing the machine, Jose scooted his chair toward the cop, "lifted his leg, and passed gas loudly" according to the "victim."
Next thing you know poor Jose is charged with battery. He's just a drunk Mexican trying to have a little fun. My guess is that he's "battered" his kids a number of times like this and they all thought it was hilarious. I know I was "battered" by my dad on a number of occasions. In the car. On the couch. At the dinner table. My dad was always "battering" us kids. I didn't know I could prosecute.
Anyway, Officer Parsons didn't think it was very funny. "The gas was very odorous and created contact of an insulting and provoking nature" he said in his complaint. So he's saying that Jose's gas actually made contact with him? Dude. That is crazy gas. Maybe a few too many refried beans and chile rellenos for Mr. Jose.
Jose did acknowledged passing gas but said the cop wouldn't allow him to go to the bathroom and complained: "I just couldn't hold it anymore." Now Jose could be facing time in prison, and could possibly even end up in the gas chamber.
Sorry - I couldn't help myself.
4 comments:
I protest most vehemently. I never battered you at the dinner table. At least I never told you to pull my finger!
Dude, so does this mean I can charge Jon with spousal abuse or do I have to have some type of 'proof'? (don't get me started with what I can provid for evidence)
I love the fact that this guy "scooted his chair toward the cop," Awesome.
Don't forget Loubige....it can go both ways!
wow. were you this funny in college? laughing so hard right now. you're a nut. btw, we're in mexico city for bruce's firm, but i'll email you a more complete update.
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